This year has been both a season of sunshine and rain. I’ve said goodbye to a wonderful man I loved deeply, but am filled with the hope of embracing our little one someday in the future. It’s been a season of tear-filled prayers and of joyful answered prayers. We still wait expectantly, yet stay very busy getting our house and home ready for our little one.
We have no new updates…..other than we’ve heard from our adoption agency that they are expecting a large amount of referrals this summer. Which makes me smile! Smile, to think of lots of little ones being united with their forever families. We wait now to hear when referrals are expected to come in, and will be keeping our phones close during this time!
The next step still remains……to wait.
Since there are no new updates….I thought I would share what is in my heart today! And those of you that know me best, understand that I am not a woman of few words, and pray constantly for God to help me keep my mouth shut and listen more! lol Anyway, I will try to keep it at a minimal….but want to share the core of why our family has chosen adoption and why so many, many other believers are out there in the world putting the love they have so sweetly been given, into action….
Yesterday God reminded me to keep my eyes fixed upon Him. “Looking unto Jesus the author and finisher of our faith” Heb 12:2 For when I am fixed upon Him, I am filled with all of Him, and nothing else can compare to Him. I want Him always to be first in my life, because without Him I am miserable and sadly lacking in all the good fruits of His Spirit……love, joy, peace, patience, kindness….and can do nothing truly good without Him.
His love has always been my release, healing, power and strength….and was one of the very first lessons he taught me in 2011 when he woke my heart up- out of a complacent “Christian” walk.
I must remember this foundational lesson, and keep my eyes fixed upon my Father. For I love Him, know and rest in His love more with each passing day. It’s a deeper love……a knowing and trusting this love will hold me. I remember my Aunt Chris relating this love to her relationship with the love of her life – my Uncle Mitchell. She shared how over the years their love changed…becoming much deeper, full with a trust and a knowing–that comes only in godly love matured with time.
She related this love to the love she knows of her heavenly Father to be true. There is an absolute trust and dependency developed over years of steadfastness. It assures that nothing could keep you from being loved….that in difficulty, sorrow, life or death it will hold fast and secure. It’s a confidence that no matter how circumstances change, His love never waivers or fails. “Love never fails.” I Cor 13:8
We feel this pure love through the outpour of His Spirit….and even in those sorrow filled moments that I’ve witnessed recently….watching my Aunt mourn the loss of her life long friend and love……when she said at times all she felt was numb and could only weep…….that even still there is a knowing that this love remains….
“these remain, but the greatest of these is love.”
When we rest beneath His wings; we are renewed and refreshed by our Beloved’s love. It quenches a thirsty soul and heals a broken heart. As we sit as clay on the Potter’s wheel we feel His love shaping and molding us in our broken and dry places. He isn’t afraid to touch the places in us we’ve hidden away, or to take the impurities of hidden hurts we’ve carried far too long.
It was never His plan that we would walk and struggle through this life without His help. In love He knew we were but clay, and that sin would decay….cracking and wearing us to death. He knew we would need saved from this death so in love He defeated it. O death, where is thy sting? O grave, where is thy victory? ….He will swallow up death in victory; and the Lord God will wipe away tears from off all faces.” I Cor 15:5 & Isaiah 25:8
He then knew we would need shaped, molded, and strengthened by the fire that He would stand in with us. “Lo, I see four men loose, walking in the midst of the fire, and they have no hurt; and the form of the fourth is like the Son of God.“ Dan 3
His plan and promise was and still is: to “never leave us or forsake us” …..for He knew this life would be too much for us to bear alone. He prayed to the Father “that the love wherewith thou hast loved me may be in them and I in them” John 17. Everything we would need, would be found in His love. He knew when he spoke this prayer, He would soon be crucified, and we would need power to endure.
So, it’s in His mercy and love for us that once He went to heaven He sent the Holy Spirit to abide in us, working through us. His work was finished, and we had the strength needed to “Go and preach the gospel” be “salt and light” to the world and “share the hope that is within us.”
This Holy Spirit is His gift to us, for He didn’t want to see his children bound and helpless against the attacks that would come through Satan. He loved us….gave us this beautiful gift…yet so many refuse it…..and have never felt this sweet Holy Spirit. It comes without reserve to those who will seek with their whole hearts in humility. And comes in more fervor to the servant willing to embrace and wash the dirty feet and fill the hungry and desolate.
For just like Jesus, we go to the lost and abandoned….we go to the places where spotlights don’t announce our arrival, and where reward of work is laid up in a heavenly land. So, to do the work He has called us to do, He has equipped us…..with with Holy Spirit and by His truth – found as we take in His Words.
It’s most assuredly love that sends the Spirit to enable a human body to give up its own life for the lost, sends one small woman in strength to cross hundreds of miles of Chinese mountains to save hundreds of orphans, and give one woman and her sister the ability to forgive and love in the midst of a hate-filled concentration camp. It’s only by His love and power we are able to accomplish or do any good.
For “love bears all things” It is found to burn with the most fervor and heat in the midst of life’s most demanding and tough circumstances. It gives a wife the strength to care for her sick husband, it gives a husband unconditional love and mercy to care for his wife who’s been filled with pain the doctors can’t diagnose. It’s a phone call to the hurting, it’s a visit to the lonely or widowed, and a soft word instead of a biting one. It’s found in a woman willing to sell her earthly possessions to gain heavenly ones by serving the lonely, lost and forgotten.
The Holy Spirit is love in action.
Danita Estrella http://www.danitaschildren.org/
Love helps a heart quickly see the ugliness of pride and repent. “Love believes the best“, when there is no physical evidence. It “hopes all things”, when not one glimmer of light can be seen. “Love never fails.” It stretches through into eternity when a man and wife or parents and children are separated temporarily by death. Love is the cord that reaches around the world joining a mom, dad, brother and sister…. to a lonely orphan in China.
It’s His love.
The love willing to come down from a glorious and beautiful throne to be beaten, spit upon, whipped, and humiliated in nakedness. “He bore our transgressions, and by His stripes we are healed”….all because of His great Love for you, and for me.
“the love of God is shed abroad in our hearts by the Holy Ghost which is given unto us. For when we were yet without strength, in due time Christ died for the ungodly. For scarcely for a righteous man will one die: yet peradventure for a good man some would even dare to die. But God commendeth his love toward us, in that, while we were yet sinners, Christ died for us.” Rom 5:5
There is no other feeling that compares to His freeing love spread across my heart. When I seek Him, it fills me to the brim and overflows so others can “taste and see that He is good” and that “His love endures forever” and find the same hope I’ve been given.
I love you all & hope you feel this great love today, and know how precious you are to Him. This great love is why we were put on this journey to our little one……and each one of us, (with no exception) every day, no matter if in our kitchen, the mission filed, or in the workplace is each called to love. And we can have the power to love if we’ve first been loved, filled and healed by Him.
“We love because He first loved us.” 1 John 4:19
Thank you for listening to my heart….and waiting/hoping along with our family for our little one. I know she’s coming soon! We will keep you updated over the summer & most certainly send out a post if we get a phone call!